Remember the days when you were a few days away from jumping on a plane and flying off to somewhere that isn’t a very cold and rainy UK….me too. That feeling is now replaced with one of anxiety, dread and shaking like a shitting dog in the fear that your Covid test comes back as positive and ruins your plans for a nice week in the sun!
We are now 2 days away from a week in the (hopefully) sunny Canary Islands and yesterday was D Day, or as I have renamed it S Day, which means sticking a shitty swab up your nose, not literally a shitty swab but you get the point, and then having to wait 48 hours (literally less than 12 hours before we fly) to see if we get the go ahead to travel.
The usual feeling of the pre holiday buzz has been replaced with me refusing to pack my suitcase just in case we can’t go, checking my emails every few minutes to see if the results have come back yet, the pre holiday de-fuzz has been pushed back to the last hour…I am not shaving if we can’t go 😂 and a 3am anxiety wake up call this morning panicking over every possible scenario that can go wrong!
What if the test gets lost in the mail? What if the tests are inconclusive and we don’t have time to take another? What if it comes back positive? What if, what if, what if!!!!
I am not even sure why I feel this way and why waiting for the results are turning me into a nervous bloody wreck?! I haven’t been around anyone with Covid, I have no symptoms and I wear my mask and wash my hands like a good girl (more so in the last week than ever!) yet I still have a twitchy bum and a heavy feeling as you hear so many people that have the virus without showing any symptoms at all.
I am fully aware that everything is now out of my control…AND I DO NOT LIKE IT AT ALL. I am apparently turning into a control freak…which trust me, is never EVER something that I thought I would say.
I also know I am not alone in feeling like this and have friends who are due to travel soon and are also bricking it in case anything happens to disrupt their travel plans. It also doesn’t help matters that the test is £120 each which makes a cheap last minute deal, not that cheap at all and if the worse happens and the test comes back positive…it will be the shittest money I have ever spent 🤣
So for now all I can do is wait, wear some holes in the carpet, pacing whilst constantly refreshing my emails every few minutes and keep my fingers, eyes, legs and arms crossed that everything comes back OK and that we can enjoy our well needed escape before what looks like a very bleak January ahead.
Is it the end of the world if we aren’t able to go…no, we have insurance that means we get can get the holiday cost back (minus the tests) if our tests come back positive. Are there people in the world who are in a much much much worse position than we are with much bigger things to worry about right now…definitely and I am fully aware of this.
I guess what I am trying to say is I miss the buzz and excitement that I used to get before a trip before this bastard virus came and ruined the whole world and everything that we knew pre November last year.
I am sure that excitement will return promptly as soon as we get the test results back either today or tomorrow (unless it is the answer we do not want, then it will be a huge tantrum and most likely…well 100% a mini meltdown with tears!) and then I will be moaning about having to pack the case (which I HATE doing) and doing a last minute de-fuzz so I do not resemble a yeti whilst I am away 😂
I long for the days when this wasn’t even a feeling that I would have to consider before a holiday and the anxiety that seems to build with every minute longer our results take…I only sent it off literally 24 hours ago 🤦♀️ but it feels like I have been waiting a year!!
So anyone that is reading this, please send positive thoughts and keep everything that you can cross, crossed for us in the hope that we can get on the plane on Saturday and save my poor husband from 2 weeks of me moping about the house, climbing the walls and finding him endless DIY tasks to do.
The holiday buzz will return without the need to test, swab and isolate….and I for one CAN NOT wait for that feeling to return…whenever that may be xx